Saturday, April 30, 2011
The Loving-Kindness exercise continues to be a beneficial, open-ended guide of opening my heart, which is relaxing and calming to such a significant degree. The Integral Assessment was helpful, but not surprising. Although I do not regularly do such specific meditations as prescribed in the exercises for this class, I do regularly review my life and assess the different areas that are going well and not going as well as I would like. The biggest area of struggle in my life is a mix between interpersonal and psychospiritual (I think). I have been finding it difficult to remain calm in the face of my semi-rebellious almost 6 year old, who is incredibly strong-willed. I tend to engage in the battle with her, instead of allowing her to learn that Mommy is an adult, and adults do not get wrapped into child-like behavior. It is a lesson I have failed many times, but am THANKFUL that I am finally able to remain calm and assertive with her. Several things had to come into place to allow this to happen, but one of those things did include all the beneficial information and mental training I have been receiving in this class. The other things that had to come together, though, was remembering how beneficial it is for my daughter to receive some discipline when acting inappropriately, remembering that I do not have to lose control in order to enforce rules, and then having a good system for rule enforcement. A good friend of mine was super beneficial in helping me to start an excellent system for rewarding appropriate behavior and gently redirecting negative behaviors. It has worked wonderfully already! Some of the specific exercises I can do to help continue to work on this area is the loving-kindness exercise, which is helpful just to remember the importance of these two attributes. Other practices can be to take deep breaths when feeling my emotions come to surface, speak very quietly when I really want to yell, and if all else fails just send my daughter to her room for a time-out before I lose my patience and things go really south. The biggest thing is for me to prepare myself mentally throughout the day for the likely challenges ahead, and then planning a course of action to protect all of us from a loss of control. All-in-all, great stuff!